Which techniques and tricks do you use to motivate yourself? Rewards, timers, affirmations, coaches, or maybe criticism, shame, fear, and consequences? Although there is many options to motivate oneself, mercy is one of the very best.
Unfortunately, mercy is often seen as a form of pity, as if only useful for the problematic or destitute. This type of mercy actually labels and reinforces a state of helplessness in the individual. Therefore, this “mercy” can be very demotivating.
True mercy is the acceptance of one’s humanity. The acceptance of one’s own capacity for misunderstandings, misgivings, and mistakes – as well as one’s capacity to learn and grow from one’s experiences. If true mercy is present, one can grow patiently and progressively. This growth can occur without being stalled or rushed because one is confident that mercy is protecting and supporting the process. With true mercy, one can create life with greater clarity, peace, and wisdom without condemnation. Mercy empowers our current state of being with a release of the past (no more frantic fixing), self acceptance, and creative courage for the future. With mercy, we can embrace ourselves and the process.
Mercy is defined as compassionate forgiveness. Compassionate forgiveness is motivating because it restores hope in our process and opens us up to different possibilities in the future. Here are at least 3 great reasons that mercy motivates:
- Mercy builds a secure sense of self worth. A secure sense of self worth enables someone to persist through difficulties, unexpected changes, and even failures. One does not need the achievement of the goal or idea to validate their worth. Therefore he or she can make adjustments and keep moving. If a person believes that mistakes or failures are an indication of their worth, the risk of failure is too great to move forward.
- Mercy facilitates discovery through decisions. If our decisions define us, then again the risk of mistake is too high to try new choices and learn new lessons, for any learning process begins with an awareness of what we did not know. When we learn what we did not know, we realize our decisions before this were missing aspects of wisdom that we now see as important. This is humbling and uncomfortable, yet with mercy one can embrace this process of growth. Mercy supports our ability to decide and decide again. Most indecision stems from harsh criticism, whether externally or internally. When past decisions are harshly criticized, there is little to no incentive to take the opportunity to try and decide again.
- Mercy accepts the humanity of everyone building group support and momentum. Mercy allows us to feel connected, understood, and accepted. This engages us in sincere relationship which carries us through difficult seasons or bolsters our endeavors with great success. Mercy invites others into our process, removing the shame and isolation of mistakes or failures. This mercy is motivating.
I touch on why I believe mercy is such a powerful motivator in this video:
I encourage you to open up your heart to mercy, from within and from those around you. An ancient proverb states, “A merciful man is good to his own soul…” In what ways is your heart asking for greater mercy? Have you felt stalled? Have you been striving to prove your worth? Have you felt disconnected from others unless at top performance? Maybe, it is time to embrace the power of mercy. Maybe, its time to have compassionate forgiveness on your process. Maybe, just maybe, in the light of mercy’s rich kindness, you will find the motivation to live from the heart of your humanity.
Much love,
