Everyone’s Daddy had a Daddy
The other day my young boys were fascinated with the realization that their daddy had a daddy, and his daddy had a daddy. And that his daddy’s daddy had a daddy. They continued to pursue this line of thinking til it became just as overwhelming as it was fascinating.
“Wow” they exclaimed! “That is so amazing, did you know that everyone had a daddy, Mom?” I nodded while folding clothes with a brief, “Yeah, cool, uh?” Yet, later that night, my heart asked me what I really understood, appreciated, and respected about the momentum of generational lines.
The Powerful Momentum of the Generations on the Heart
In today’s society, we often believe that we can cut off from the past by moving, starting something new, forming a new relationship, or learning a new skill. This way of thinking overlooks the intense and deep patterning of heart and soul that occurs by the momentum, training, influence, and acculturation of our generations. To deny our history is to choose ignorance of our present.
I have often seen people “embrace generational blessings” or “break generational curses.” I believe it is important to come into agreement with the momentum of our positive and powerful generational benefits. I also believe it is important to recognize and renounce the dysfunction of our generational patterning as well as the insufficient coping responses to trauma in our generational line. These generational influences are like powerful undercurrents that will pull and persuade us despite our best efforts to use logic or new relationships to make a difference.
Here I share my passion for appreciating, understanding, and adjusting our generational momentum:
Absorbing Generational Patterns
The patterns of the heart are absorbed, not learned. That is why unlearning and relearning is severely limited. We must do the work of the heart to really experience any “new” and fresh ways of being in our lives. The absorbent period of life is known as birth to 6 years old. During this phase, one absorbs what he/she experiences as truth, as the way things are. Then these patterns of belief and relating are developed and strengthened through life. The strong formation of individual in such early years is why the ancient proverbial wisdom exhorts us that “train the child in the way he/she should go, and he/she will not depart from it.”
Even in the womb, a child begins to be imprinted with the generational way of being. The heart is the first organ to form and the neurons in the heart as well as throughout the body are perceiving the fear, joy, relational patterns, and much more from the family lines influencing him/her.
Christ admonished that all men and women must be born again. He also stated that to receive His ways of being and doing, we must become like children. I believe He is talking about the process of vulnerably opening our heart and soul to re-experience the absorbent stage of life. God invites us to receive fresh and divine history, heritage, and momentum not just of mind or routine but powerfully and completely absorbed into the heart. Therefore, Art of the Heart sessions, while acknowledging the importance of information, realize that the heart and soul must experience and feel differently from the core for lasting change.
Celebrating Generational Hertitage
Generational momentum is, for the most part, a positive. If your family line has made it this far, it has done exceptionally well. This world has its fair share of trauma, war, disease, pain, and problems. If you are here now, your family line has survived quite a bit and that is something worth celebrating!
I wrestled with my earthly inheritance, in some ways it seemed wonderful, yet in other ways, I wanted something different. I wanted more momentum in the the areas of life I struggled to thrive while others seemed to be riding the waves of generations past. I also struggled with the acknowledging the beneficial shifts for which I was now responsible. I denied that any changes were necessary, fought within unhelpful patterns, separated myself by denial, and simply endured cycles with more fervor – none of which were effective or a benefit to me or anyone else for that matter. That is until I discovered the deep and powerful work of the heart.
In my heart, I did not find magic but I found clarity, power, and passion. I began to accept the inheritances, influences, and momentum that I had been given. I worked with what I had. Acceptance of my history did not make me less powerful but gave me more access to work with what was real. I could appreciate the beauty of my heart’s history and had the courage to align, heal, and clarify the formation of my heart in vulnerable ways. From the depths of my heart, I began to reshape patterns that I wanted shifted for the generations to come. I often had to go to very vulnerable places, feel the pain that I used to cope or fight against, and invest in the internal reworking of family patterns. Sometimes, I felt unloyal, ungrateful, or uncertain, yet I have discovered the best way to honor our heritage is to identify and rewire patterns that no longer serve it.
Change In The Future Is In Your Heart
Unfortunately, I see many parents attempting to see generational ways of being change because they give their children better education, more resources, or even spend more time with them. These are great additions but are insufficient to realign the heart. Our relational patterns, coping techniques may get more sophisticated but are likely no more beneficial to the heart and soul.
I would like to challenge you to not impose change on our children that you have not deeply shifted for yourself. When we expect them to practice what we are not, to follow our words but not our actions – we impose unrealistic expectations on them, feed feelings of inadequacy, and relinquish the hard work to others while neglecting our own role we play in the generations. Children will most profoundly follow our hearts, not our words. In Parent Child Heart to Heart Sessions, the impact of the parent-child heart to heart absorption is brought to light, giving fresh connection a chance.
The heart is the deepest and strongest force in pattern formation – I believe that is why the entire New Covenant is based upon the work in the heart. My heart had a history more profound than even my personal memories could inform. The heart was hungry to clarify the history, to resolve the pain, to break the trance of “this is the way it is”, and to have a heartfelt meaningful influence in the way that my generational momentum moved forward. At first, I felt intimated by this endeavor, yet it has proven to be the most rewarding and life giving experiences. I offer Art of the Heart sessions because they are effective, honor the generations, and when practiced have the power to magnify the blessings and minimize any curses.
If not you, who? If not now, when? Consider engaging in the alignment of heart and soul. You and your future generations (biological or not) will reap the rewards for thousands of years. Yes, your heart is really that powerful!
Much love,
